Amputation, Dirty Pictures and The Butterfly Effect

Aroused iguana may face chop

"AN IGUANA stuck in a permanent state of arousal, six days after a mating session at a Belgian zoo, may have to have his penis amputated if the condition does not improve. But he will still be able to reproduce - iguanas have two penises."

In other news: new research published by the International Association of Research Association (go ahead, try and look them up) concludes that giving viagra to an iguana might be entertaining, but it's pretty silly when you think about it for a while.

Teacher barred for sex lesson

"A NEW York teacher has been barred from classes and faces the sack after asking 12 -year-old pupils to draw male genitalia on the blackboard during a health lesson. Theunnnamed teacher's fate will be decided on March 21."

What really happened is that one of the 12-year-old boys didn't draw to scale, and felt dwarfed by his classmates. Then the 12-year-old girls made 12-year-old giggles and the teacher endeavored to elaborate on the age old battle of "size matters" vs "it's how you use it".

Family fined over boy's scream

"A DOG barked, startling a four-year-old boy who screamed, scaring a flock of chickens, resulting in the deaths of 443 birds in a stampede, a court in China ruled yesterday.

The boy's father was ordered to pay £120 in compensation to the owner of the chickens."

To recap: dog barks, boy screams, chickens die, dad pays. Just can't catch a break, dad - can you?

Thanks to Scotsman.com for these tasty morsels.